I have a few kids. Both this side of Heaven and not. There came a time early in my marriage that we were ready to have kids. Very quickly did we learn that they were not coming the ‘old fashioned’ way, and we were going to need to travel great lengths for them. Let me tell you, we’re still traveling. Our kids are a life journey. But I wouldn’t have it any other God-bless-it way.
When we were ready to start having kids, we heard about, in the most roundabout way, that there were some kids in an orphanage in Uganda, being looked-over by other potential adopters and locals. They were toddler boys, and they had been living in the orphanage for quite a while. The chances of being adopted were lessening the older they got. At some point they would be moved to a boarding school where they would no longer be eligible for adoption. Some of this is true, but also with, what we later would find out were, some lies sprinkled in. Nothing was really as it seemed, but nevertheless, after communicating with the orphanage director, she wrote to us and said “Please come.” Our road to adopting our oldest son was a long and hard one. I was stretched in ways that I never knew could be stretched, and I became completely and utterly undone along the way. There were lessons learned that I sometimes wish I could unlearn. There were things I saw that I wish I could unsee. There were mistakes made that I wish I could have avoided. I have this amazing son here today, but I also have eyes wide-opened to a world of struggle, hate, lies, and deceit. I have not a single doubt in my mind that God intended for this little boy to become my son though. The right path in life sometimes has some passage ways that take some very wrong turns. The road is long and the gate is narrow, is what I hear. It’s easy to get confused and go the wrong way. I spent a lot of time in prayer, trying to will my path straighter. We certainly tried our best. We took many wrong turns, but gainfully ended up in the right place, in which we could enjoy one of the most beautiful countries on the planet, with some of the most notably wonderful people I’ll ever know. In the end, two more littles came to us in the following 2 years, one at a time, thanks to 2 incredible Ugandan judges that valued life in such a way, that they knew a life having missed the love of a family, was not in the best interest of any child. Ever. An incredible group of siblings was formed. We are a very tight-knit group over here, and forever grateful for this whole experience. Good and bad.
I have the advantage of being called Mom. I work tirelessly to earn my stripes. I, in no way shape or form am a show off. But nothing will come in between me and offering the best I have to these kids. When I write about them, don’t ever think I’m trying to express that what I’m doing is the ‘right’ thing. Its just what I know is the right thing for my kids and my family. What a lousy parent I would be if I spent my time taking what someone else finds best for their family, and providing it for mine. So don’t do that, and don’t take what I say that way. Ultimately, as long as what we all are doing, is best for our own families, that’s all that counts. We all need to find our path. We all need to spend endless hours, buried in the trial and error of this parenting thing, because that is the universal thing that IS best for all families. That’s all I’m trying to do here. I talk about my kids alot. The good, the bad, and the ugly. Our family wasn’t delicately woven together just for the heck of it. There are glorious miracles that need to be shared. There are #thestruggleisreal moments. There are goof-ups and mistakes. And there are 3 pretty darn cute kids that love to cheeseup their mugs for the camera.
Adoption is tough, I’m not gonna lie. But it’s worth it. I have a vast array of resources under my belt for those of you that may be interested in learning more about the different adoption options. If I ever meet you on the street, don’t ask me these questions in front of my kids. They can all hear. They all have little hearts, and little souls, that hurt and break easily. I’m their Momma and they like it that way. Sometimes adoption brings with it some broken heartache, and we don’t all need to bring it up and remind them every chance meeting we get. MMkay? I’m happy to talk about or answer any questions you may have without them around. Email is best 🙂
Finally, I just want to make sure to tell you that adoption truly is a God-designed gift. He created the beauty of it himself, and He should get all the glory. I didn’t save any kids, they aren’t lucky to be here because of anything my husband and I did. God’s word has been exemplified in my family through His very blessing, because he desired it. He did a beautifully wonderful thing for us. It’s something that is available to everyone, not just by adopting children, but thru the power of our creator adopting us, Himself, to be His own. Because He wills it.
Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places, 4 even as he chose us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before him. In love 5 he predestined us[a] for adoption as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will, 6 to the praise of his glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in the Beloved. Ephesians 1-3:6